Randine Scheffler

Randine Scheffler, age 66 of Trenton. Born October 13, 1947, died August 2, 2014. Beloved wife of 48 years to Dennis, whom she married on August 7, 1965. Loving mother of Reshelle and Todd (Jean). Proud grandma of Katarina, Maxwell and Julianna. Dear sister of Robert Waller, Becky (Jerry) Carpenter and the late Allan Waller. Cherished family member and friend to Lance (Kathy), Terri (Jim) Parks, Joyce Craanen, and many others. She loved spending time with family and friends and also enjoyed cooking, sewing, gardening, and traveling. Donations may be made in Randine's memory to St. Jude Children's Research Hospital, P.O. Box 1000, Dept. 142, Memphis, TN 38148. Please reference Tribute # 36392262. Donations may also be made by calling 1-800-805-5856. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Randine's Eulogy In Loving Memory of Randine Scheffler October 13, 1947 – August 2, 2014 Thank you for coming today to pay your respects and to honor my Mom, Randine. She leaves behind a husband, daughter, son, daughter-in-law, granddaughters, a grandson, and many family members and friends. We all had a unique relationship with my Mom and I thank you for being part of her life during both the good times and the tough times. And especially this past year when she battled cancer. You were there not only for her, but for my whole family. The last year and last weeks have been difficult and we couldn't have managed without all of your love and support. As her daughter, I am honored to deliver her eulogy. When I think of my Mom so many things come to mind – she was beautiful, strong, thoughtful, stubborn, sweet, feisty, loved life, a great cook, an excellent seamstress, a true friend, a hard worker, a doting grandmother, a loving and devoted wife, and the best mom. She had a great sense of fashion and always looked put together and beautiful. She put herself and her love into everything she did. She was actively involved in the American Legion Auxiliary and helped reinstate the VFW Ladies Auxiliary at the Trenton VFW Post 1888. She was devoted to all causes that supported the Veterans, as they held a very special place in her heart – starting with her Vietnam Veteran, her husband Denny. She had a beautiful smile that she loved to share with everyone and she had the ability to make others feel welcomed and comfortable around her. She was helpful and always had an ear to lend. She loved traveling and just over a month ago she went on her dream vacation to Hawaii, which was a cruise that went to four different islands. The highlights of the trip included a day long visit at Pearl Harbor, a luau on the beautiful island of Kaua'i, and most importantly spending time with her Dear husband Denny and best friend Joyce. My Mom held many different roles throughout her life and the most important role she held for me was "Mom". And she was the best Mom anyone could ask for. I have so many memories and not enough time to share them all. I'm truly blessed to have had such a wonderful mother. In addition to being my Mom, she was my teacher, my friend, and my hero. My Mom was my very first teacher – teaching me how to talk, love, hug, tie my shoes, and welcome my baby brother Todd into the family. She taught me so many valuable lessons and instilled strong values in me, which helped make me the person I am today. I will be forever grateful. Some of the things she taught me were good manners, the golden rule, compassion, do your best, and have respect for your elders. She taught me there were consequences to misbehaving. I remember one time when I was around 10 years old and I was mouthing off. She warned me if I didn't stop I was going to get soap in my mouth, but of course I didn't listen. So, she followed through, and unfortunately for me we were out of bar soap, so I got Palmolive liquid dish soap. Yep, I think I was blowing bubbles for a week! My Mom also taught me the importance of sharing your feelings and having faith. Every night my Mom would tuck me into bed and we would say bedtime prayers together and she always kissed me good night and told me she loved me. And every morning she would have breakfast ready for my brother and me. She made our lunch and kissed us goodbye and always told us she loved us before we headed out the door. Even if she was mad or upset, she said she loved us and we knew she meant it. My Mom taught me how to cook, clean, balance a checkbook, be a good friend – all of those life skills that are so important. She also taught me to follow my dreams and to never give up. My Mom was my friend – but first she was my Mom, my parent, my protector. Our relationship grew and developed over the years and as I became an adult we built a very strong friendship. I could always rely on my Mom for advice, a shoulder to cry on, support, and eventually I was able to reciprocate. After I went to college and then eventually moved away, I always treasured coming home. She would welcome me with open arms and the house would be spotless. She wanted to do this for me, and she always made me feel special and loved. We would sit at the kitchen table and talk for hours over glasses of wine. And when she would come to visit me, I would do the same thing. Clean my house like crazy before she arrived to ensure it was spotless and we would stay up late, talk, and drink wine. She taught me well! We enjoyed traveling and having "mother/daughter weekends". We spent a long weekend in San Francisco to celebrate her 60th birthday and a little over a year ago we went to New York City to visit family. My heart aches knowing this was our last trip as I was looking forward to making more memories with my Dear Mom. My Mom was my HERO because she was a strong and independent woman, a fighter, put others first, sacrificed for her family and friends, and never complained. This past year really illustrated her strength, but as I was reflecting on her life, I realized she was a hero long before being diagnosed with cancer. At the age of 14 she lost her father in a car accident. It devastated her mother, and in some ways she lost her mother too. She married at a young age, and after being married for a few short months she saw my Dad off to Vietnam. She started losing her hearing and eventually lost all of her hearing in her right ear. She had a cochlear implant, but hearing still remained a challenge for her. She lost her Mother and too many close friends to cancer. And almost a year ago she was diagnosed with lung cancer. Like all of the other losses she experienced, she handled it with courage and grace. She lost her independence, but didn't lose her faith, positive outlook, or inner strength. She was a fighter and I'm so proud of her. My Mom was so brave, even towards the end of her life she continued to put others first. A couple of weeks before she passed away we were talking and I shared with her that whenever she was ready to stop fighting I would support her. I told her I didn't want to lose her, but because I loved her I was ready to let her go when she was done fighting. I emphasized I wasn't giving up on her, simply that I was there to support her decisions 100%. She shared with me that she was worried about me. I promised her I would be okay and not to worry, and to focus on herself. The last two days of her life were so incredibly difficult. My mom, the amazing women that she was, sat up waiting for me to get home to Trenton. I made it in time to see her and say my final good bye. It was definitely one of the most heart wrenching moments of my life, and what gives me comfort is knowing she is in a better place and nothing was left unsaid between us. I will miss my Mom, my hero, every single day and will forever be grateful for all that she did for me. One phrase that my Mom always said was: "Everything will be okay." She said this throughout my whole life and it helps me navigate through tough times. Right now it's hard to believe that, but I know in time everything will be okay, it's going to be a new okay, but things will be okay. And that is because she taught me how to be strong and how to persevere. She will always be my Mom and also my teacher, my friend and my hero. I'm comforted knowing my Mom is in heaven, resting, free of pain and suffering, and reuniting with all that have gone before her. I miss her so much already and I hope she knows she was loved immensely. In closing I want to share a reading called "Gone From My Sight", by Henry Van Dyke. "I am standing upon the seashore. A ship, at my side, spreads her white sails to the moving breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength. I stand and watch her until, at length, she hangs like a speck of white cloud just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other. Then, someone at my side says, "There, she is gone" Gone where? Gone from my sight. That is all. She is just as large in mast, hull and spar as she was when she left my side. And, she is just as able to bear her load of living freight to her destined port. Her diminished size is in me – not in her. And, just at the moment, when someone says, "There, she is gone," there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices ready to take up the glad shout, "Here she comes!" And that is dying…" ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Eulogy written by Reshelle Scheffler, 8/8/14 "Gone From My Sight" by Henry Van Dyke