Tell Your Story

August 9, 2023

I wouldn’t consider myself a historian or even a history buff, but I do enjoy history and the telling of stories. The one fascinating part of all of it is this none of us where there at the time the events happened know exactly what happened. At this moment you’re wondering what this is all about. It’s about you the one who is reading this and saying to yourself what is this man talking about? History? Yes, your history and your life story is what this is all about. Have you ever sat with family members a parent, grandparent, aunt or uncle and listened to them? I mean really listened to what they are saying. I’ll explain further in a moment, but first a back story.

In 2013, (wow time flies) I had begun to do what many call urban exploration where I would photograph abandoned buildings in various stages of decay. It was pretty exciting at the time driving through Detroit, looking for former industrial buildings, former churches, synagogues, stores and so forth. There was a certain amount of beauty in these structures as they had begun to be taken over by the environment around them.

One day as I was taking a “ride” around the city I had remembered a church off of Linwood and Blaine streets I would pass often while headed to do my studies. With camera in hand, I found what I was looking for. To my disappointment as well as excitement the church was abandoned and beginning to crumble. I noticed something odd on the building for a church, Hebrew letters and the words Mishkan Yisrael. Then I knew this at one time had been a synagogue. There was a sense of excitement racing through me, I had to know more. Who? What? Why?

I answered those questions and many more over the past ten years. The who the what and the why weren’t always answered as quickly as I thought. It was countless hours of looking at newspaper articles, census records, cemetery records, etc. What am/was I doing? As I was researching the structure and as I went along many other structures, I noticed names of people who were affiliated with the organizing, planning, building and use of the buildings. This opened up a whole new mystery. Who were these people and what did they do? I found many to be butchers, bakers, attorneys, tailors, dressmakers and many other occupations. The one thing they all had in common was they had lived in these communities I was driving through looking for buildings to photograph. Again, I rummaged through, Polk guides, newspapers articles, census records and more to find out about where these people lived and how they interacted in the communities they lived in. It wasn’t always easy as I would take a look at some of the records and find a few things out or nothing at all, there were many times I hit the jackpot and there would be a wealth of information (obituaries are a great resource).

Now to what this whole thing is about. It’s about you, your family and your story. Listen closely to those stories the members of your family tell. Write them down, and add a few photographs or even ask family to write them down. Trust me there will come a day you wish you had.

Creating Personalized Funeral Services

Creating Personalized Funeral Services

December 4, 2024
Personalized Merchandise : Offering personalized merchandise can provide attendees with keepsakes that remind them of their loved one. Custom printed memorial bookmarks, candles, or photo books featuring cherished moments can serve as lasting mementos. You could also consider unique items like custom jewelry containing a portion of the deceased's ashes or engraved with their handwriting. Interactive Memory Stations : Setting up stations where attendees can share their favorite memories or write messages can foster a sense of community and shared remembrance. You could provide a memory tree where guests can hang notes or photos, or a digital photo booth to capture heartfelt moments and messages during the service. Unique Tributes : Consider incorporating elements that reflect the individual’s hobbies or achievements. For an avid gardener, you might hand out packets of their favorite seeds or plant a memorial tree. For a sports enthusiast, displaying memorabilia and encouraging guests to wear team colors can create a sense of unity and celebration. Digital Tributes : Embracing technology can add a modern touch to traditional services. Live streaming the service allows distant friends and family to participate. Creating a tribute website or social media page where people can share stories, photos, and condolences helps keep the memory alive long after the service. By thoughtfully incorporating these creative elements, you can craft a funeral service that truly honors the life and legacy of your loved one, providing solace and connection for all who attend.

My Life Journey Brings Me Joy

August 30, 2024
Life Is a Journey By Alvin Fine Birth is a beginning and death a destination; But life is a journey. A going, a growing from stage to stage: From childhood to maturity and youth to old age. From innocence to awareness and ignorance to knowing; From foolishness to discretion and then perhaps, to wisdom. From weakness to strength or strength to weakness and often back again. From health to sickness and back we pray, to health again. From offense to forgiveness, from loneliness to love, From joy to gratitude, from pain to compassion. From grief to understanding, from fear to faith; From defeat to defeat to defeat, until, looking backward or ahead: We see that victory lies not at some high place along the way, But in having made the journey, stage by stage, a sacred pilgrimage. Birth is a beginning and death a destination; But life is a journey, a sacred pilgrimage, Made stage by stage...To life everlasting. Additional Thoughts... Death, Dying, Dead…words we try not to use as they are so final, yet they are the reality of a life lived. It is exactly what we need to do as we journey live our lives to the fullest possible. Death is the final frontier, yet we try so hard to hide from it as if it will never come. Yet it is in our daily lives. A seed from a flower enters the earth, it sits beneath the surface of the soil, patiently waiting. Yet does the seed know it is alive? It knows exactly what to do, it takes in nutrients from the earth, slowly but surely establishing roots. As the roots grow deeper into the earth a stem and leaves push their way above. The tender leaves feel the warmth of the sun pushing further. The rain comes and nurtures the tiny seedling, it drinks in the cool water and continues to grow. The sun, the rain continues to grow reaching higher as if forms leaves, and buds that continue into beautiful flowers. The flowers feed the bees; mankind notices its beauty for a fleeting moment in a face paced world. The flower continues to smile and knows one day its life will be over, it knows it has fulfilled its purpose. The sunny days grow shorter, the nights are cooler the bees visit less often. The flowers begin to fade, and seed pods begin to form. The once beautiful plant looks a bit tired; its leaves have begun to brown and fall. Yet it continues to smile knowing it still has purpose its seeds will be the next generation.
Benefits of Funeral Pre planning

Benefits of Funeral Pre planning

August 9, 2024
Show you care by Pre Planning Funeral pre planning is a thoughtful and compassionate act that can significantly ease the burden on your loved ones during a difficult time. By making arrangements in advance, you provide your family with clear guidance and reduce the emotional and financial stress they might otherwise face. Here are some key benefits and steps involved in funeral pre planning:
Grief and Children

Grief and Children

May 31, 2024
Losing a loved one is an incredibly challenging experience, and when children are involved, it becomes even more complex. As parents or caregivers, we want to support our children through grief and help them navigate their emotions. Here are some tips to handle grief and loss of a loved one when you have small children:

Fred’s Friends Day Trips

February 29, 2024
What makes the day trips unique? Who are they for? What do those who have went on one of the day trips have to say?

Think Before You Speak

November 3, 2023
When attending a funeral or a visitation think before you speak. Why you may wonder or even ask why this is important. Think of how you felt when you learned of the death of someone you cared so deeply about. Your mind went through many things at the moment of learning of the death. Why? Why now and not later? It can’t be true! My heart hurts. I can’t live without him or her. What do I do now? It is an act of kindness to express your sympathies after a person dies, but what do you say? Common things are, I am sorry for your loss, Please accept my condolences, or sometimes just being present and listening, truly listening is more valuable than any spoken word can be. One has to understand a person has just suffered a loss, that at times may be devastating to the person or family and friends. It does not matter how long the person may have lived, it may have been ninety years, forty, thirty or even ten or a matter of moments. Under any circumstances do not diminish the value of a life. The person mattered to those who are grieving. Consider this a woman has carried a child for nine months and the child is still born or days after birth the child dies. Both parents feel the anguish of the loss as well as the family. A young woman’s life is taken by murder, those who loved and cared about her feel the loss. A wife suffers the loss of her husband to a heart attack after more than fifty years of marriage. A child riding his bike is struck by a car and dies. What do all of these have in common other than the fact that they have died? Each of them along with their family and friends had hopes, dreams, memories and a plan for the future. Be sensitive to the needs of those grieving and think about what you may say to those suffering a loss.

Native American Poem

May 8, 2023
Native American Poem

An extract from Fahrenheit 451

February 22, 2023

The Holidays

December 5, 2022
They come every year whether we like it or not. The “official” start of the holiday season being Thanksgiving. Yet, does grief increase at this time of the year, or is just more noticeable to any of us who are grieving a loss. In reality grief is always with us we tend to keep it to ourselves and try not to let others know we are still feeling the loss even years later of someone we cared deeply about.

An extract from Winnie the Pooh

September 7, 2022
By AA Milne If ever there is tomorrow when we’re not together… there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart… I’ll always be with you. Who would have thought growing up reading Winnie the Pooh books that a golden yellow bear was giving us so much insight? Most of us probably didn’t even realize there was a deeper meaning in those words. The ones above have to have the most intent two lines that seem so simple but yet have such depth. If a word with depth so deep at times we begin a sentence with if or what if, if only, or If I had or if I were a rich man. Life is filled with many ifs and if we don’t experience it in the full, we will never know. With that being said what was AA Milne telling us? Most likely that life is meant to be lived and all of us will be apart from someone we love and care about at some time or another. Yet the reality is the deeper one that death will occur and we will be separated from the one we love for a time. There is a silver lining in this, we will be reunited with those we love. The message is pretty clear if you don’t over think it, if you take it as it is. Yes, loss is painful and it will happen in our lives and we will develop our own ways of coping from past experience. And YES, we find we can and will survive no matter what.
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